


Numb

by kjt



Series: Paralysis [1]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: A Little Bloody, Angst, Car Accident, Disability, Disabled Character, Family Fluff, Fluff, M/M, Married Life, Masturbation Interruptus, newly disabled
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-06
Updated: 2016-09-06
Packaged: 2018-08-13 09:04:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,252
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7970968
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kjt/pseuds/kjt
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When life gives you lemons you make lemonade in your new wheelchair.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Numb

**Author's Note:**

> Snk Mini Bang fic! My artists are Proferivai and Tipsy-Lemon, who are are still working. Poor Proferivai was sick for two weeks!  
> I think I scared Tipsy. They do not like sad stuffs. This fic is sad stuffs. If you want, you can find me on tumblr @kjtrandoms
> 
> So here, have some warnings:  
> -A little sad. Then sadder.  
> -Some happy, fluffy good times.  
> -Levi is sexually frustrated. Eren doesn't help.  
> -There will be blood  
> -There will be waking up in a hospital  
> -There will be devastating news

Despite the poverty that he lived in, Levi had been a happy child. He had very little but he was loved and cared for. And that was all that mattered.

When his mother passed away, his happiness died with her. Her illness was one that Levi wouldn't understand until he was older. Her wanting her only surviving brother to become his guardian was something he'd never understand.

Life quickly became dull and his uncle did nothing to make him feel better about his new situation. The nights were long and cold without his mother there to hold him and the days dragged on miserably. 

The only thing his uncle taught him was how to fight and how to win. Levi was surprised that his uncle never lost custody of him. No matter though, the man left him after he felt Levi was trained enough to fend for himself. So that's all Levi knew for several years, to fight for scraps or steal. This was life. It always would be. He accepted this and knew that there would never be anything better.

Or so he thought. . .

 

If you asked Levi where he thought he'd be at thirty years old, it certainly wasn't this. Living a perfectly blissful, domestic life. Surrounded by family and once again loved. Not having to worry about money. How he'd get it and if it was enough. In fact, money was the least of his worries now.

He was always busy. Spending his days stuck on phone calls and in meetings and enough paperwork to last him into the next life. It didn’t stop at the end of the work day. He went home only to spend hours ensuring the gardens and landscaping of his property were pristine. Or working on some ridiculously huge, time consuming project with his daughter. Then there were the scheduled trips to the park, playdates, running errands, planning dinners with the in laws . . . Levi never stopped moving and he loved it. 

He lived excessively now and he wouldn't deny it. Perhaps he was slightly overcompensating for all the years he'd lived in small, dirty places but who cared? He had his large white house and the multiple vehicles which were traded in yearly for the newest models. His property looked like one from those home and garden magazines. Everything in Levi's life was so neat and uniform it was bordering ridiculousness. Well, aside from the big, dumb dog that his husband just had to have and the cat who sometimes didn’t quite make it to the litter box. Gross.

Then there was his family. His gorgeous husband, Eren. Who had nicely toned skin and messy, brunet hair. And those eyes that continued to ensnare him like they’d done the first time he’d seen them fifteen years ago. 

Together, with the help of a lovely surrogate, they had a beautiful daughter. Who seemed to function more independently than her brown haired father and was a split image of Levi. Five year old Jade who, recently, demanded to go by Elliott. Then there was the newest edition to their little family, another daughter who was barely a month old yet. Baby Evi, unlike her sister, took her appearance from her other father. From the big, beautiful eyes to the brunette hair that sat in a tuft atop her head. Not to mention that adorable single curl that stuck upwards.

Last but not least, the woman who made their family possible. Shorter than Levi, Petra was a kind and wonderful soul whom they'd requested to be their surrogate over six years ago. The three of them quickly hit it off and so remained close. Petra loved being a surrogate but after receiving the chance to grow so attached to Elliot, she’d pretty much given it up. That was until Levi and Eren told her they’d wanted to try to have another child. She offered excitedly.

Yes, Levi would say his life a picture of perfection. Quite proudly at that. He never imagined that one day it’d all come to a screeching halt.

 

And so begins the first day of Levi's new life. A day that starts like any other . . .

 

Levi wakes in time to catch a quick glimpse of Eren’s nude backside before he disappears into their bathroom. A wonderful sight. A sight that has him rolling over onto his back with the thought of maybe rubbing one out fast. He doesn’t get very far before Eren’s looking down on him from the side of the bed.

“Bad kitty.” He scolds while squirting Levi with a water bottle.

“C’mon, dick,” Levi reprimands while finding protection under the blankets. “That’s for the cat!”

“Well you were being bad. How else was I supposed to get you to stop?”

Levi risks a peek from cover and is met with another blast of cold water to the face. His only option is jumping out of bed. Which sends Eren fleeing. Or trying to. It takes Levi all of two seconds to catch his harasser.

“You shitty brat.” He scolds while throwing Eren over his shoulder. Smacking him on the ass.

“Brat? I’m older than you!” Eren explains while repeatedly slapping his palms to Levi’s rear in return before he’s tossed to the bed.

“That’s it. You’re getting fucked.” Levi demands while crawling between Eren’s warm, bare thighs.

“Uh-uh.” Eren replies while Levi continues trying to seduce him. Laying his hips flush with Eren’s. Dipping down to nibble on his ear, to kiss his neck. “No sex. No nothing. Not til tonight.”

“Fuck that.” Levi growls.

“Hey, they’re your rules. I’m just helping enforce them.”

“I take it back. It’s stupid.” He retorts before biting down on Eren’s neck softly. Eren laughs and Levi knows he could never grow tired of the sound.

“Yes,” Eren captures Levi’s lips with his own. “It is.” He opens his mouth in the slightest, their tongues barely meeting. “But,” He mumbles against Levi’s mouth. “I kind of,” He rolls them over so that he’s straddling Levi. “Like denying you when you get yourself all worked up. No matter how tempting your hard cock feels rubbing in my ass crack right now.” And with that he hops off before Levi can stop him.

“You fuckin’ tease.”

“Happy anniversary to you, too. Now get up. You’re gonna make us late for work.”

“Remind me why we didn’t take today off as well?”

“C’mon, lover.” Eren walks away from the closet and back to the bed. He bends down to tease Levi for a moment before disappearing into the bathroom again.

“You’re not allowed to tongue kiss the tip unless you show the rest of it equal treatment.” Levi jokes. Talking loud enough for Eren to hear him over the sound of the shower being turned on. He’s met with an inaudible reply, as Eren must have closed the shower door. He rolls out of bed with a sigh and begins his morning routine.

 

Twenty minutes later and they’re both nearly ready to go. Levi’s little game of grab-ass has Eren running to the kitchen in a fit of giggles. They’re met by their daughter, who they’re surprised to see is out of bed and and ready to go as well. They tell her as much and she responds by asking,

“What are tongue kisses?” 

Levi tells her to nevermind it as he kisses the top of her head. Ruffling her dark hair. She chides her papa for messing it up.

“It’s how kitties give each other kisses, sweetie.” Eren retorts.

“Daddy, why would you be giving papa kitty kisses on the tip?” Eren struggles to hold back a laugh that comes out as a snort. Levi smacks him for it.

“The ears! When kitties lick the tips of each others’ ears!” Levi blurts out the quick explanation.

“Oh. Can I do it, too!?” Levi side eyes Eren who’s keeping his face hidden behind the fridge door until his wide grin subsides.

“Sure, sweetie.” Eren replies. Grabbing the milk from the fridge and closing the door now that he’s composed himself. He rubs his stubble on Elliot’s ear. “Kitty kisses!”

“You’re prickly!” She exclaims through laughter while struggling to push her father away with her tiny hands. “Kitties aren’t prickly!”

“This one is.” He answers while tickling her. “What do you want for breakfast?”

The three of them settle on the stools along the center island and eat together as they do most days. Eren’s mother joins them shortly after with baby Evi sleeping bundled up in her arms. Levi skims over emails with his tie tucked safely into his shirt. While Eren becomes so engrossed in reading the paper that his tie dips or drags into his meal. Which is why Levi is always cleaning his damn ties or just buying him new ones.

The day continues on as normal. Paperwork, phone calls, meetings, emails, texts. More paperwork, more meetings. Non-stop communication. The same things all day, every day except for the fact that Levi fails to concentrate in any meeting that Eren has to sit in on. This mornings tease invading his mind involuntarily. The staff notices. Eren definitely notices. And to Levi’s torment, his husband will follow him back to his office for a quick tease before leaving him blue-balled.

It does nothing to help the hours pass, seeming to drag on forever. Levi tries not to watch the clock but unable to stop himself. The time finally comes to head home and Eren pokes fun at his sexually frustrated husband. Telling him with a laugh that he probably would've been more productive if he'd stayed home. Levi is far from amused.

 

 

 

 

Everything is packed and ready to go for their mini honeymoon they’ve had planned for months. They kiss their children goodbye to leave them with their grandmother. Carla pinches Eren’s cheek and warns him to be good. He swats her away with all the fond annoyance a son shows a loving mother.

They stop to check into their hotel quick and Levi attempts to get frisky. Sadly, he’s thwarted. He hates himself for making that stupid fucking rule the week prior.

A high class restaurant is their first event for the evening. The usual schmoozy place: everything classy and overpriced. Suit and tie to get in. A secluded table in the back. Candles here and there and an expensive bottle of wine in a bucket of ice. Not that the ice was needed. Levi powers through the bottle pretty quickly, leaving his love with only a glass. Eren doesn’t mind though. He smiles brightly at Levi. Loves seeing him a little drunk and a touch flushed. Loves it when Levi stops being proper and gets a bit handsy in public. And how he rambles on in Eren’s ear about all the things he wants to do to him. Eren just laughs and commends his lover on his near constant erection throughout the day.

Eren pays the tab without looking at the total and leaves a generous tip. He steadies his husband as they make their way out onto the street. Stumbling their way to the car in the cold February weather. 

“And to think, you were once a scared fifteen year old threatening to shoot me with a spray painted squirt gun. Now look at us!”

“It was an airsoft gun and I wasn't scared, jackhole.” His words are slurred and his insult is loving.

“Whatever. The point is, is that you were trying to rob a gas station with a plastic gun.”

“Well I didn't want to actually shoot anyone. I was just trying to survive. How many times have we been over this already?”

“Not enough and you'll never hear the end of it. It's a great story, the day we first met.”

“You know what's a great story? The first time you actually let me fuck you. Fucking A, I'd never been rejected so much in my life.”

“You were a minor!”

“Didn't stop anyone else.”

“Thank you for lumping me in with the douchebags who took advantage you. The saddest part was that you didn't know any different. For a child to accept that that was life, fucking heart breaking.”

“Yeah, yeah. Let's not talk about my shitty past. We should be discussing all the things we're going to do once we get in the car.”

“Mm yes. Enjoying the heated seats while I escort your drunk ass around town.”

Their vehicle was finally in sight and Eren had to let go of Levi for a moment to dig in his pocket. Hitting the remote start button on his keys. The car was still cold once they got in it but the leather seats had warmed enough to take out the chill. Eren had to keep scolding Levi for taking off his seat belt. The man was on a mission and Eren couldn't get him to stop. He remained firm in his decision to not let his husband give him road head. Much to Levi's annoyance. 'All you have to do is sit there!' He'd argue.

Eren laughed at the irritation. Making his way through town. Night had fallen but the moon illuminated the snow, making everything brighter than any summer night. The roads were dry and the weather wasn't too bad for the time of year. Eren tried to remain concentrated on driving but Levi was making it difficult.

“I wanna give you this thing.” Levi remembered, half hanging over the center console, reaching behind the driver's seat.

“Dammit Levi, sit down and buckle! It can wait.”

“It can't. I'll forget again. Fuck, it went under the seat.” Levi proceeded to clamber into the back.

“I will remind you to get it once we park. Now get your ass up here.”

“Why, you gonna let me blow you?” Eren shakes his head with a smile at the suggestion. “Better yet, why don't you pull over and you join me back here.”

“We are not fucking in the car. Our children sit back there.” Eren laughs.

“Fuck stains are no match for humanity's cleanest.” Levi attempts to sound sultry while nibbling on his husband's ear.”

“C’mon now, no distracting the driver.” Eren states while touching his cheek to his shoulder and swatting Levi away.

“Alright,” Levi begins climbing into the front seat. “You win. I -”

He never gets the chance to finish whatever it was he'd began to say. A lot seems to happen at once but when Levi comes to, all he remembers is being blinded by headlights for a split second before the feeling of an impact. Metal crunching and glass shattering. The sound and feel of the airbags. He's laid out awkwardly over the center console with his head hanging down to the passenger side floor. The car horn is blaring and he calls out to his husband over it. He struggles to prop himself up when Eren doesn't respond. There's blood seeping into his hair and down the side of his face but he doesn't notice. His mind has thrown his body into shock. He doesn't feel any physical pain. Only emotional when he sees the love of his life unconscious, face resting against the steering wheel, covered in his own blood.

He sits up and reaches for Eren with trembling hands. Afraid he'll do more damage if he touches him wrong. He doesn't know where the blood is coming from. Just that it's there and there's so much of it.

“Eren?” When he lightly puts his fingertips under Eren's chin, there's not so much as a twitch. 

“No. Nonono. Eren, love, wake up. Please. You're OK.” Levi says it more as a comfort to himself as he gently places a hand to Eren's cheek.

“It's OK. Everything's gonna be alright. . .fuck.” Levi's eyes begin to well with tears as he fists his hair. He inhales deeply. Mumbles out an 'ok’ and exhales as deeply in an attempt to calm himself. He notices Eren’s brown locks are stuck to his skin and so he pushes them up out of his face. 

“Help me!” He shouts. The next two words come out as a whisper as he begins to sob into his husband’s dirtied hair. “Somebody, please.”

It's then that Levi begins to notice the small movements of Eren's chest rising and falling. He's still alive! He's breathing! Levi's overwhelmed with hope.

“I don't want to leave you but I have to. I have to go find help. Just hang on, OK?” He places his hand on Eren's cheek again and the other he cards through his love's crimson soaked stands. He kisses him. Kisses him on the forehead, the cheek, his lips. Levi's own mouth is painted with Eren's blood but he doesn't care. 

“I love you.” He says just before he stumbles out of the wreckage. 

He's tipsy as he walks down the side of the paved road. Hoping someone drives by but no one does. He loses his footing and tumbles into a ditch. Tries to get up but his body fails him. He quickly begins to fade. He never sees the flashing lights or hears the blaring sirens and he thinks ‘this is it’. He's failed in saving his husband and himself. When he loses consciousness it's to the painful thought of Elliott hearing the news. The look on her face when she learns that her and her sister will be growing up without their fathers.

 

 

Although he regained consciousness several times, Eren has no recollection of how he went from driving to waking up in a hospital. Doesn’t remember fighting against the straps of the gurney to get to Levi. Straining so hard against the confines that he had to be sedated to control his blood loss. Now he lies bound to an unfamiliar bed. The only light comes through the slotted, vertical blinds. It’s early morning, he thinks. Or perhaps it’s late afternoon?

He struggles to move. His reach is extremely limited but he finds that there is a call button resting in his left palm. Grasping it, he hits the red button on the end with his thumb and waits. Mere seconds go by. Too long. He hits it again, quickly becoming panicked the more he thinks about Levi. If he’s in this situation then what happened to Levi!? Is he ok? Is alive!? Eren begins hitting the button repeatedly and it doesn’t take much longer for someone to arrive.

“You’re finally awake.”

“Dad?”

“Heard you put up quite the fight on the way in last night.” Grisha seems cheery. It's a false cheer and Eren knows it. He's bared witness to his father's bedside manner many times.

“I- what happened? Where’s Levi?”

“He’ll be ok. He’s in the ICU. You wer-” He begins to explain while undoing the leather straps that hold his son's hands in place.

“ICU!? That’s not fine! What happened to him!?” Eren can’t help the tears that begin to flow involuntarily. “Is he ok? Did I crash the car? Did he go through the windshield? I told him! I fucking told him not to climb back there.” He begins to say something else but it’s quickly broken off into a sob.

“Everything is going to be ok, Eren. I promise! Please, just give me a moment to explain.” Grisha gently grasps his son’s hand. Holds it in his own as he looks Eren pleadingly in the eyes. Eren sees tears welling in his father's own. “Please.” Eren takes a shaky breath and nods.

“You were in an accident. A drunk driver ran a stop sign and you t-boned him. If he would’ve called 911 instead of fleeing this story could’ve been different. Before I start I want you to know that everyone’s been waiting to see you. They’ve been here all night. Would you like me to get them first?”

Eren hardly considers it before he’s shaking his head no.

“Dad, just tell me, is he ok?” Grisha looks a bit more pained. Perhaps due to the fact that he can’t put off the news any longer. It’s his turn now to let out a shaky breath,

“He’s in a medically induced coma-” Eren lets out a pained sound as his father hurries to explain. “Not an actual coma. He can and will wake up. He just needs to stay asleep for his injuries to heal more first.”

“How long?”

“They’re estimating around two weeks.” Eren turns his face towards the pillow as he inhales deeply through his nose. Attempting to hold himself together. “Eren, the way Levi impacted . . . based off the damage report, his head smashed into the control panel. Which we believe may have caused damage to his second and third lumbar vertebrae.”

“English, dad.”

“The injuries he sustained at impact could have been easier to repair but . . .”

“‘But’ what? Will you quit dancing around it and just tell me!?”

“He staggered some distance away from the car and was found in a ditch. Probably to get help. When he fell it caused, what appears to be, complete breaks to the vertebrae. Meaning he won't feel anything from the waist down. At first anyway. Over time he may regain sensation in some spots. . .”

“Dad . . . ?” Eren looks to his father in terror but there's still a shed of hope in his eyes.

“Levi is paralyzed, son.

Eren sits there for a moment, staring blankly at nothing. Almost as if it takes a moment to register what's been said. Then he breaks. He lets out a gasping sob and before the tears can begin to fall again, Grisha is pulling him into an embrace. A hand on the back his head, keeping his face buried in his father's shoulder.

“This isn’t happening. This is a bad dream. I’m going to wake up from this.” He prays as he clenches onto his father's shirt.

“Eren,” Grisha's voice is sorrowful. “I know this is a lot. Try to take some comfort in knowing that everyone out there waiting to see you, they’re all here to support you and Levi. We’ll help you the best we can. Our lives will change as we aid you in the changes you’ll need to make. Life isn’t over, son. You’re here. You’re alive and well and Levi is, too.”

“Take me to see him. Please.” Eren demands, pulling out of his father's embrace, wiping tears and snot from his face.

“I'll call a nurse and -”

“Don't make me wait.” Eren pleads with his father. “I want to see him. I'll rip all this crap out myself if I have to.”

“Alright but you're going to let me help you into a chair because I don't want you walking quite yet.” Grisha begins to remove Eren's IV.

“Fine. Just hurry.”

It doesn't take long to unhook everything from Eren's body. Not that he needed them badly anyway. More of a precaution. It takes all of five minutes of his father wheeling him through the hospital until they're approaching the curtain Levi is behind. Grisha stops for a moment when he hears his son taking a deep breath.

“Ready?” Eren nods his approval and they're moving forward again. Grisha pulls the curtain just enough for them to get by before closing it promptly again.

Eren's tears had subsided but were back in full force at the sight of his unconscious husband. His hair had been shorn and there were tubes in his mouth and nose, held in place with white tape. Aside from the medical devices attached to his body, Levi looked fine. At first glance, he didn't appear to even be injured.

Grisha stopped the wheelchair as close to the side of the bed as he could. Telling Eren if he needed anything that he'd be right outside. His father didn't wait for a response. Didn't expect one.

Eren immediately stood from his chair, reaching for Levi's face. Running his hand over the short velvet that was left of his husband's beautiful dark hair. He felt the stitching there, on the crown and he remained silent for a while. Wanting to say everything but nothing all at once. He was at a loss. His legs were beginning to strain and it reminded him of what Levi had lost. How unfair it was that he could feel his and Levi could not. He fell back into his chair in defeat.

He took Levi's hand and held the back of it to his face. Felt the knuckles against his cheek and the tears that began to cover them. He brought that cool, pale skin to his lips and kissed it softly.

“I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. This is all my fault. I did this to you.” He spoke quietly. Lips moving against the back of Levi's hand. “My love, could you ever forgive me?”

He lowered Levi's hand back to his side on the bed. Placing both of them under the blanket. He pulled the white cloth up to his chin. Infuriated that anyone could allow Levi to be so cold. He then laid his head down, resting it against his husband's shoulder. Sliding his hand under the covers to entwine his fingers with Levi's.

He didn't know how much time passed this way. To the sound of Levi's heart rate beeping on the screen or his own quieted crying. Shoulders slightly heaving with each sob. He didn't care though. He was exhausted and he welcomed sleep. Hoping that when woke, they'd both be home in their bed. None of this ever happening.

**Author's Note:**

> My disabled aunt was the inspiration for this story. The accident is loosely based on hers when she was 18. Too bad she died at the ripe old age of 26 (when I was 18) because she would've loved to read all my gay shit. Probably would've requested HP fics from me. Peace Aunt Steph. You were a fuckin' terror to me as a child but turned into that awesome aunt when I became a teen. Oh the dickscussions we'd have if you were alive today.


End file.
